UNDECIDED

Something's bothering me for quiet some time now - it's the decision making!

Before we go down to my problem, here're my history.

Since I was a kid, I always dreamed that someday I'll be able to get away from home and live all by myself. I'll take care my self and won't worry for anything. Until now, I'm still holding this dream. An apartment, stable job, busy life - in short being independent!

I started to close my dreams for a little while when I met Harold. He's my boyfriend... my everything and my life! I gave my ALL to him - and that means ALL! He shared his dreams to me. Like graduating from college (he's graduating student now), own a restaurant and marry me (aww... shucks!) We're not that permanent. We've been together for five months and in little time I get to know him better. My parents knew him at totally disagree about him, especially my mom. This disagreement starts to complicare our relationship.

He has this demanding attitude. He's really a pressure to me. He's not that understanding person and somwhat hates my parents. I hate his attitude, but somehow I can't leave him easily. In fact, I'm not planning to leave him. I love him that's why despite of his bad attitude. I careless about it.


He's a charmer, sweetie and knows how to tame me. He really know how to take care a lady (in actual), but he doesn't know how to comfort. He's a negative person, and being an optimistic... this scares me. I really need to change his attitude... but in his case, I really can't do it easily. Maybe, time will.

Now, here's the problem. My dreams are now in my grasp and yet it makes my head hurts and my heart split by two. On the contrary I'll be marrying someone who I barely do't


If I follow my dreams, I'll end up going to abroad and fulfill my dreams. But, I've got to leave Harold behind. Not just him, but my friends too. The place I used to hangout and memories...


But if I stay with him. I'll end up graduating here. I still need to find my job which is surely might be temporarily and I have to stay with my parents until my head literally split into two!

I really can't decide by now... But as each day passes.. it's getting worst!